Baptist preachers have a reputation - probably deserved - of being fat. That doesn't make them slow bellies. A lot of it is an occupational hazard. Part of it is ignorance. This blog is dedicated to blasting ignorance with a little knowledge - and a few laughs!

Thursday, March 26, 2009


I probably don't need to emphasize the general topic of "food" and how important it is to our overall health, to say nothing of our very overall weight.  How much food we eat, how often we eat it, and/or what kind of food we eat are all very important.  We all already know this.


Of somewhat less importance is whether or not we juice our food.  If you really enjoy the taste of  food juice, I say go for it; juice your food.  Be aware, however, that not all foods CAN be juiced, at least not in a juicer.  Bacon, for instance, is best juiced in a hot skillet.  Ditto for beef steaks, pork chops and chicken, though these latter also lend themselves to being juiced over a hot grill.


Food is only half the equation in weight loss.  Of equal importance is exercise.  There are a few hardy souls who see sports as an appropriate way to get exercise.  Easy enough for those who are blessed with strong bodies, tall bodies, coordinated bodies and/or hyperactive bodies in the first place.  Those of us who are a little weak, a little short, not very coordinated and/or just plain lazy need a better alternative than sports.


Jogging used to be popular when I was younger.  Not with me, of course, but with the overweight old people in my neighborhood.  I had a Dodge Dart which was my idea of exercise.  Exercising my freedom, I would hop in it whenever the mood struck me and head for a fast food outlet and overeat.  Not on anything that had been juiced, either, unless soft drinks count.


I'm older and overweight now, but jogging still isn't popular with me.  I don't like getting outside in all the weather, being chased by dogs while I run past all those fast food places and then get home hungry.  Pointless.


I'd rather run in place at home.  Or, in some cases, even sprint at home.  Sprinting from the office to the refrigerator is great exercise, and sometimes you can find some freshly juiced Coke in there, too.  Once, I found an entire cheese cake, unjuiced!


Remember calisthenics?  I think this became the rage shortly after John Kennedy was elected President last century.  (Or was it last millennium?  In any case, it was definitely a long time ago.)  I remember being in a classroom with a lot of other second graders while our teacher tried to teach us calisthenics, one of which was "deep breathing."  Even as a second grader, I was insightful enough to realize that I was NOT going to end up looking like Arnold Schwarzenegger by doing "deep breathing" exercises!  On the other hand, I've found that this is one of the few exercises you can do in your sleep, and there's certainly something to be said for that!


Other calisthenics are a little more profitable, even if they have to be done while you are awake and standing up.  "Toe touches" help keep you limber.  If, like me, you've not had occasion to touch your toes for a while, you may want to try it, just to see how limber you aren't.  If you want to do this exercise on a regular basis, by all means work your way up to a reasonable number by starting with just a few toe touches.  My personal recommendation is to start with one.


By gradually increasing the number you do, over a period of only a few months you can work your way up to ten, possibly more.  Be careful, however, since doing too many toe touches may result in lower back pain.  Here is the medical definition of lower back pain:  "Pain in the lower back, not to be confused with pain in the neck and/or other areas of the anatomy.  Often caused by too many toe touches."


"Jumping jacks" are about as sensible as they sound.  Avoid them, and judge the value of all calisthenics by their names.  "Squat thrust," for instance, is a combination of words that no one had any business teaching second graders in 1961, and no adult in 2009 in his and/or her right mind has any business trying to do one.


Many of my friends have machines of one sort or another that provide them with a needed dose of exercise:  Stationary bikes, stationary treadmills, stationary boats, stationary hang gliders, stationary bungee cords (for those who prefer extreme exercise), and a few things that look like stationary torture racks.  One man I know says he gets all the exercise he needs just moving the stationary bike from one side of the living room to the other.  


Here where we live in Thailand, we have a stationary mountain.  It combines most of the benefits of every form of exercise I've ever seen, even deep breathing.  In fact, especially deep breathing.  Plus, you can get out in the weather and be chased by dogs, just like jogging.  You can get dirty and sweaty, just like sports.  You can fall down, twist your ankle or otherwise injure yourself, just like most calisthenics.  And, the view from the top is fantastic.


There is only one drawback:  A stationary mountain is a little too big to fit in your living room!


Off to the gym,



PS  Seriously, though, exercise is important.  The most important exercise is exercising oneself to godliness.  Compared to that, bodily exercise is of little profit.


That's not to say that bodily exercise is of no profit.  In fact, it can be of quite a bit of profit, if it helps keep you healthy and able to serve others.  It's certainly much more profitable than a lot of other things that take up our time, some of which are – to our shame – of no profit whatsoever.  (I didn't say TV; did you?)


Way back in 2007, it was my hap to light upon Tom Venuno's website.  Although very skeptical, I finally decided to order his free mini-course, called Big Fat Lies.  I didn't use my usual email account, because I was even skeptical of his spam policy.


I knew, by the second installment of Big Fat Lies, that Tom was a sensible man, six-pack abs notwithstanding.  And, I never got any spam from him or anyone else remotely concerned with weight loss.


A recent unexpected gift allowed me to purchase his eBook, Burn the Fat, Feed the Muscle.  I was already exercising, working out with dumbbells for up to an hour a day.  I was glad to read the book and find out what I was doing right (a little), what I was doing wrong (quite a bit), what more I could do and how I could get more results in the process.


I'm not an aspiring bodybuilder.  I'm not in a contest; it's not about looking good on the beach.  It's not about me; it's about being able to do the job the Lord has given me.


I just want to be a wise steward of the gifts the Lord has given me.  I never knew many of the things I learned from this book, or I'd have started this years ago. 


If you're in the same boat with me, you're definitely going to be interested in this.  You can start with the mini-course, or you can just purchase the eBook now and check it out for yourself.  It comes with an 8-week, no-risk, unconditional 100% money back guarantee!


Would I kid you?


For more information, send an email to me at

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